Conservative Cyclist Sick of Being Grouped in with Environmentalists

SEATTLE, WA—Twenty-seven year old Jebediah Burl isn’t a fan of the “environmentalist” cyclist stereotype.

“Just because cycling is one of the most eco-friendly ways to travel does not mean that I care about the Earth,” remarked Burl. “Sometimes I wish I could combine the joy of zipping over bike trails with the fuel efficiency of a Hummer.”

“If I didn’t have my ‘Don’t Tread on Me’ sticker, I’m not sure that others would understand I’m not a liberal,” confessed Burl. “Take last year’s Trump rally, for example. Do you have any idea how many fellow conservatives didn’t believe I wanted to expand fracking in protected lands?”

Burl believes that we need to adjust how we perceive cyclists in our society. “Just riding a bike shouldn’t automatically give me a label,” he said. “I wish people would pause before making assumptions about whether someone wants to save the environment.”

Readers of The Salt may find more information about Burl and his cause at his newly-created Facebook group, “Conservative Cyclists Against Conservation.”

–Joey Silknitter